Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Because Nothing Can Be Simple...

So about two weeks after I wrote my last post I ovulated, and I pretty much knew I would get pregnant. Our "timing" had been right even though we weren't particularly trying since we had only just gotten J's genetic test results back (J's test said he was normal, but I have yet to call and see just how in-depth the test we took really were, so I was/am leery of conceiving without PGD). Getting knocked up is not our problem, so I just knew. Sometimes it seems like we can't not get pregnant.

Anyhoo, I made it to 11dpo and I took a digital hpt, and it read "pregnant." On 13dpo I took a baseline CB digital with weeks estimator and it read "1-2weeks." I was able to get a beta at 14dpo and it was 116, a pretty good number in my book. My repeat was 488 at 17dpo, and I was relieved since if the number had been ambiguous I might have pulled my hair out. I kept begging the universe "please nothing ambiguous, let it either more than double or be falling. I want a black and white number, no grey!" Then my 2nd CB digital with weeks estimator read "3+weeks" a week earlier than I expected it to so I was pretty satistifed!

I had my first u/s last Friday at 6w0d (adjusted for ovulation- another older egg on CD19). Luckily the embryo made it to the uterus (yahoo!) and I saw its flicker as soon as the sac was located on the screen :) Heart rate was 113, which the doc was happy with since it was still so early. The C-R measurements read 5w6d/6w0d/6w1d, which lined up exactly with dating. Another relief. However things took a turn when the tech went to my R ovary. This wasn't my first rodeo, so I knew immediately something did not look right. Huge black spaces that were measuring 7/8/9cms. I have never seen such huge cysts in my ovary before, and there were a few of them. I knew I was right to be concerned when she went to my L ovary and it looked normal, with nothing measuring over 2cms. I love getting that sinking feeling in my gut. I met with my doc, another Dr. S, and he felt great about everything baby-wise, except oh wait, there was a subchorionic hematoma. Fun! Oh and those large cysts, which could cause torsion with extreme pain and immediate surgery. Lovely! All kinds of awesome news! So no sex, exercise or strenuous activity until my u/s next week.

Can nothing be simple? Seriously? It feels like a joke. Baby looked great, it made it to the right spot and seemed to be thriving, but I don't get to enjoy that because I have two new big worries. I refuse to google the hematoma because I know enough to be worried and I don't need to read the horror stories. Same for the cysts. I'm keeping tabs on every twinge and ache on my R side. Urrrrrgggghhhh. I could scream!! I'm trying to be optimistic, I really am. I have few to no symptoms, but I'm still hopeful. Especially given that this all reminiscent of what happened a year nearly to the day with the Turner's baby last February. We had doubling betas and a good 6w u/s with her, but everything still fell apart. There are no guarantees for us, but I'm really hoping for a happy ending this time...

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