Monday, February 17, 2014

Hesitant...

I've been hesitant to post how the u/s went on Feb 5th @ 6w2d, not because things went badly but because things looked pretty good. And it scares me. Baby made it to the uterus, and we saw a strong heartbeat of 124bpm. The yolk sac measured a bit small, but it wasn't the fanciest of u/s machines. Dr. S was really encouraging, telling me some stat that if there is a yolk sac, fetal pole and heartbeat then there is only 3% chance of m/c. I have never heard this stat before- anyone else? Though he has me labeled as "high risk" and I'm going in this Thursday for a follow up u/s.

I've tried not to be discouraged by the fact that the yolk sac measured about a week behind where I should have been. I've tried to be positive. I've tried to not even think about being pregnant- distancing myself maybe? The only symptom I have had with any regularity is sore breasts, and even that is not nearly as bad as with Ally. I had a sour stomach two or three times weeks ago, but expected the nausea to kick in around 7w like it did with Ally, but nothing. The heartburn/gas that tipped me off to POAS comes and goes. I've felt a cramp or two, but zero RLP. Not very encouraging. I sometimes wonder if I'm even making symptoms up here and there. I don't "feel" pregnant and that scares me. I am terrified for Thursday's u/s. Terrified.

2 comments:

satto said...

I know you know every pregnancy is different. I know you know a week of in a yolk sac is microscopic and if the u/s machine wasn't stellar that would explain that. I know you know a heartbeat is a HUGE thing. But I've also been there and know that you can tell yourself those things over and over but you are not going to believe them. I think with Bea I didn't really trust I was going to have a baby til I was at least 20 weeks. Is it any surprise we protect ourselves like that when we've all experienced so much heartbreak and disappointment? But from this side of the computer I am very excited for you!

AP said...

Thank you for all of the encouragement satto!